I wanted to share what we do for connecting with our kids because I'm really pleased with the way things are going! Haha. Hope this helps you, too!
Since the moment I became a mother (6.5 years ago) I have always done attachment parenting. I didn't know what that meant or that it had a name, I just did what I intuitively felt to be the best way to care for my children. I have since learned about the term and have continued the practice and am deeply grateful for the many joys I see in my family because of it.
I honestly feel that God blessed all of us with an intuition that helps us raise our children. Often times we listen to experts or well meaning friends/family members but us parents can listen inside ourselves and intuitively know what is best for our kids! IMHO ;)
So what is attachment parenting?
For us, being attached with our kids started at birth. We have had un-medicated births and establish breastfeeding within that first hour after birth and continue on for a few years, nursing on demand. We bed-share, which is co-sleeping, but in the same bed. When they need me, I come, so there is very little crying. I baby wear them when they need it and sometimes that has meant I am baby wearing while they nap because they just couldn't settle down alone! With Avril, I literally never put her down, and that's just what her high needs, very social personality needed.
Wow, writing that down makes me sound like I am suffocating them!! Ha.
Now that my kids are in different stages we continue this practice and it is going really well. I feel very bonded, connected and attached to my children and I hope they feel the same way. ;) When my older kids are talking I do my best to make deep eye contact. I listen to their stories, consistently giving them loving touch, snuggles, hugs, and compliments. We try our best to calmly and gently teach them. I put away my phone as best as I can and really try to be present. I think this has been the most beneficial for us. My very social son actually prefers homeschool rather than going to school and I'm grateful that he loves when I connect with him and teach him.
Once a week we also take our kids on "dates" for extra one on one time together. We usually do "boys time" and "girls time" because those are the relationships that need more attention. We take them to play sports, ride bikes, out to get a drink or ice cream, paint nails or get pedicures, play dress up, golfing, shopping, etc. IT HAS MADE SUCH A DIFFERENCE HOLY COW!
The purpose of attachment parenting is so that families will grow up being connected and feel trust, love and confidence, knowing that they are secure with themselves because their needs were always met as babies/young kids. If you've been searching for a new way to reach your kids, check out these resources down below!
These guys explain things way better than I ever could...
Resources to learn more-
Dr. William Sears MD is a Pediatric doctor who sort of started the attachment parenting philosophy again in America (countries all over the globe do attachment parenting in their culture, but America currently isn't as supportive in our culture.)
Gordon Neufeld PhD is a child psychologist from Canada who wrote the book "Hold Onto Your Kids: Why Parents Need to Matter More Than Peers". He has a million youtube videos too which I LOVE, I have listened to a ton of them. *I WOULD RECOMMEND THIS BOOK THE MOST!*
Mayim Bialik PhD, actress, youtuber, and working single mom of boys who shares a lot of her believes in her book "Beyond the Sling : A Real-Life Guide to Raising Confident, Loving Children the Attachment Parenting Way". I love her youtube videos on parenting! She is very chill and open minded!!
Do you/did you practice attachment parenting? Would you do it from the beginning next time around?